
www.carlascoachingforhealth.com
AT SOME POINT WE NEED TO LOOK AT WHAT IT IS THAT MATTERS TO US.... NOT WHAT IS THE MATTER.
![]() recently told that Im fanatical, or 'over zealous' to be exact. To be honest I didn't have a clue what 'zealous' meant, let alone being 'over' it!. A quick check with Professor Google revealed that it was unlikely that it was a compliment, but with the opportunity to defend myself gone, rather than take the offensive, I made the choice that there could be a grain of truth in such a claim. Reflection is never wasted with me, as there is always something new to discover and learn, this allows for creating another viewpoint rather than re-acting to someone else's. I am however going to be a bit more flexible in my own interpretation and admit to being 'passionate' and 'efficient' – Well that's my argument and Im sticking to it. In my defence, my life is at quite a fast pace at times, as Im a single mum of two, I work hard - juggling two jobs, and I make sure that I make time to play hard as well. This balancing act requires a level of organisation which allows me to live the sort of life I need to keep me sane and healthy. It is a complex blend of both stability and predictability and spontaneity. Although this could be seen as a paradox, it works for me, and when I get this mix right I feel alive fulfilled and pretty level headed. This balancing act is one that I will have to do and adjust accordingly for the rest of my life – its not a short fix. When I lose awareness of this mix, my stress levels rise and I know from experience that something will snap if I ignore it for too long. I was blessed with an insight and an awareness at a very early age (about 12 or 13) of the sort of life that I didn't want to lead (even if I didn't know what I DID want). Even though I was so young, I listened enough to let it direct my choices even if it was working at very different odds with what my family may have expected from me. Working out some fundamental needs that make my wheels spin, as opposed to falling off, has become easier the older I'm getting thankfully. Finding out what matters to us in our lives can be fundamental to our happiness and our health. Seeking happiness is not to be confused with selfishness, self indulgence, or the need to purposefully hurt or treat others badly, although it's often by making these poor choices that we can make the changes to become the sort of person we want to be. So how do we identify the key ingredients? Im going to call it 'A Blue Script', which is basically a lifestyle audit which helps to identify what sort of things bring us what we want/need, and more importantly why. This always identifies some small changes that will be needed to achieve this, but the rewards are worth it, as dealing with the small stuff, reduces the grip of the bigger stuff that stresses us out. I shall look forward to the day when GP's may even prescribe my 'Blue Script'. My dream would be to roll this out nationally. How beneficial would it be to have the GP's on one side looking at what's wrong with our physical health and how to fix it, and on the other, someone whose looking at 'what matters' and steps to achieving that. Together we would have a powerful mix. One side is the expert directing the client on what to do, the other side where the client is the expert, simply re-discovering what they value. Having being doing this for some time now I have got to see how powerful and life changing this approach can be. It also worked for me, dispelling the myth that depression can't be cured. I measure my success in my work by clients NOT requiring my service as much, as this often means they have found some strength to direct their own lives. So hows repeat business? Terrible!..which hopefully means that something's working! My simple advice is to make a choice, to take a chance, to make a change. The name of my column is called 'Expose Yourself' for a reason, because looking at our lifestyle and choices that we make under a bit of a microscope may be just what the doctor needs to order. www.carlascoachingforhealth.com
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