When there is too much drama going on in my life it suggests that I need to STOP and take STOCK of what Im trying to control. We all have an innate need to feel in control of our lives but sometimes that need can dominate us to the point of creating a life which can choke us with stress and anxiety. Life has a way of reflecting what’s working and what’s not with the patterns that show up in our lives. As children we didn’t have a choice, as we are completely dependent on our care givers, however as adults we get to choose whether we create or react to life. Creating requires the desire to learn, and if we find ourselves surrounded by constant drama? Then we need to find a way to move past it which is going to require a degree of letting go and our own need to stay in control. How can we expect others to stop attempting to control us if we havn’t mastered it within ourselves? To those who feel like it’s survival of the fittest? Suggests that they have the belief control or be controlled, yet we are more than that if we are prepared to feel vulnerable and learn another way. Whilst we are still part animal and are innately wired to fight or flee, we have the potential for much bigger states. We have a brain, lets use it to the best of it’s ability. The need to feel in control at all costs suggest an absolute fear of stepping into unknown territory. Sometimes life events can force us to go to extremely uncomfortable places, and if we are prepared to let go then a koha can often be found. Life appears to somehow find a way of throwing people or situations at us. It paradoxically has to be this way as lets be realistic, it’s not natural for us to position ourselves in really uncomfortable situations!.. Yet that’s where the sweet spot is. Those that know this state have moved past the need to be in control and have mastered responses which supercede the need for fight or flight. (unless of course their life is in danger). These folk havn’t got here by chance, oh no, they have danced with the dark nights of the soul and they know what it feels like to fight for their own peace of mind. They have learnt when to hang on and when to let go. They understand that when they are fighting they are fighting for something in their past and they have determined whether that past still has a place in their future or not and they make A CHOICE. They know that letting go is not to be confused with giving up and have experienced the ‘bliss’ that comes with letting go. Letting go is not something that can be analysed. To think about it makes it disappear. It’s a ‘state’ that sits outside of our ‘known’ selves, that’s the point!...Letting go can be practised though and those who can achieve it (without the use of substances) will reap the sustainable benefits. A decision to want to let go has to be the first step however, and the desire and the intention to want something other than what’s now. For those who feel ‘stuck’ suggests a desperate need to stay in control as the fear of the unknown feels too great. Yet it is in the unknown that great things can happen. My mahi supports those who are ready for a change and are ready to let go but don’t know how. We take baby steps towards ‘something’ else. Im not the sort of coach to engage with if there is a need to keep focusing on the past. The answers don’t lie there and neither will you find them in blame – no matter what. All blame does is validate your current state and if you’ve already made the decision that you need to change? then your ‘current’ state has no answers for you. There is tools that can assist us in transformation and some are as simple as stepping outside our comfort zones. Make an appointment for a free half hour one to one chat to see if my type of support fits with your need to soar. www.carlascoachingforhealth.com
’ve always been reluctant to write about this intangible thing known as chi or reiki. But it's time!. it’s not something we can analyse, but science is beginning to measure shifts in frequencies both inside of us and outside. From a personal perspective It’s so obvious and so elusive all at the same time, it’s something that I know exists in me and out of me, and is not exclusive to anything or anyone. Energy just IS and we are all moving in it in our own chosen ways. I love neuro science because it gives me a language to try and frame what otherwise was seen as weird. There’s been plenty of experiments done on the relationship between faith, beliefs and cells and the measurement of energy levels. One of the leaders on this subject is Dr Joe Dispenza who I’ve just recently returned from his progressive workshop. It was a life changing weekend, and was not what I expected! Which is great because If I didn’t get surprised with new information? then I would not have learned anything, and not learning anything new means no opportunities for growth and change So this is all very well but what does this mean for us on a day to day level? Each of us has an electromagnetic signature which is made up of who we think we are, it’s our belief systems. How these belief systems got there depends on our lives, our experiences and our responses to it. If we have told ourselves something long enough then it becomes embedded in us and creates our personality, or our personal reality. We all do this, this is what one of the functions of the brain is for, to make meaning of things. However, accepting that we make meanings of things also means we hold the ability to make NEW meanings, and once we become fully aware to this fact means then we have to take more ownership of what we attach our thoughts to. Our emotions will certainly inform us of that just in case we won’t. So what do we do once we become aware? We have some freedom is what, and we have a space to create something new, or we can choose to ignore it and simply go on creating a photocopy of the day before and so on. If we always do what we’ve always done, we will always get what we always got!. According to ancient writings the chakras or energy centres can become stagnant, stuck or over stimulated, so it’s no surprise that some folk want to stay asleep because ‘waking up’ means we have to take responsibility of our own choices which is always going to be uncomfortable, however that uncomfortableness is also the pathway to freedom. My mahi simply supports people through that discomfort. It is NOT my role to take that discomfort away as that will take away the gift that waits on the other side. I offer a range of ways to shift from our old ‘selves’ into a space where we can create something new. To commit to any sort of change has the potential to get the energy flowing in a more balanced way increasing better health outcomes. Once we realise that what we do (or don’t do) affects who we are then we become active participants in our own wellbeing, and once we understand that then anything is possible.
Check me out on www.carlascoachingforhealth.com
These blogs are also published in the Midweek newspaper in my home town of Whanganui NZ.